The number of bad ideas coming out of Hollywood lately is legion — but this one … oh, this one is the burning turd candle on top of the crap cake.

So here’s the pitch: Do you remember the Buffy the Vampire Slayer TV show? The one that became a cult classic? That spawned mobs of fans for every Joss Whedon-related production since then — from TV shows to movies to comic books?

Now do you remember the craptastic movie starring Kristy Swanson that came before all of that? No? Well, THAT’S the one we want to spin into a feature-length movie! And to help make this remake that no one asked for even better, let’s NOT involve Joss Whedon or any of the known characters.

OK, OK … yes, we Whedon fans can be a bit overboard in our love of all things Buffy and Joss. And the original movie wasn’t a total suckfest — it was campy and average. But in what hell dimension does this possibly make sense? Ditch the successful material and components of a well-established franchise and offend your given fan base? Really?!? That’s your game plan?

Good luck with that, Hollywood. You’re going to need it.